Hang On
by dadoinkdoink
Summary: Post 'Ground for Deceptions.' What if the Professor had not saw his brother behind Stella and Stella had taken the first bullet? SMacked! *My first CSI:NY fanfic*
1. Chapter 1

Hang On

Summary: Post 'Ground for Deceptions.' What if the Professor had not saw his brother behind Stella and Stella had taken the first bullet? SMacked!  
Disclaimer: Has Stella's last name been changed to Taylor? No. Then I don't own them.

A/N: Hey there! I am kinda new around this fandom. I thought that I would try my hand that a SMacked fic! Let me know what you think and hope you enjoy. Be warned that this is sad. And I can end it here or continue. Enjoy! :D

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Stella's POV

As I stand there, tears streaming down my face, trying to comprehend that he has know my mother all along and never told me about her, I feel something pierce through my skin and a burning sensation take over my body. As I crumble to the ground, I hear Mac screaming my name and the professor falls beside me, faintly whispering, "I am sorry, my Stella." I hear another gun shot and moments later I am able to register Mac's voice again and his arms around me.

"Stella, hang on," one of his hands leave me and seconds later he is speaking to someone else, giving them our location. Once he is no longer talking to them, his hand is brushing back my unruly curls out of the way, "Hang on Stell, they are on their way......please hang on."

I open my eyes enough to see Mac's face and the pain and fear residing there nearly makes me cry. I take and breath and clear my throat, trying to speak, but I cough instead and blood seeps from my mouth. Mac tenderly wipes the blood from the side of my mouth. "Mac..." Is all that I am able to say at the moment, the feeling of fire is rapidly spreading through my lungs.

"Ssh...ssh..Don't try to talk Stell, save your strength." I start to close my eyes, giving in to the blackness that is trying to surround me. "STELLA!!!! OPEN YOUR EYES! Come on...please open your eyes sweetheart! You have to open your eyes!" an hysterical Mac yells.

I slowly open my eyes, hating the pained sound in his voice. I want; no I NEED to tell him how much he means to me, how much I love him. Being in this situation, makes me wish I had told him that. Our heated argument flashes through my mind and I am devastated that I can't tell him I am sorry.

He half smiles, "Hear that Stell? It's the ambulance, it's on its way....Hold on for me...." he finishes, looking at me tenderly and holding me tighter.

I do faintly hear the ambulance, but my eyes feel as if they are made of lead and I am having trouble holding them open. I feel something drop onto my cheek and I am surprised to realize that it was his tear and he is crying, as he pulls me closer to him. The darkness is surrounding me and I can no longer fight it. I use all the strength that I have, despite the burning and pain in my lungs, and I look him in the eyes, "I *cough* love *cough* you Mac." I finish as another round of coughing hits me. Tears are flowing freely from both of us as he leans in close, pressing his lips gently to mine. I faintly smile, as the blackness closes in.

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Well, there you have it. My first SMacked fic. Should I leave it as a one-shot or turn it into a chapter story? I am okay with doing either, although I have never really killed off a main character before. Let me know what you think!  
Thanks!  
:D Doink Doink


	2. Chapter 2

Hang On- Chapter 2

Disclaimer: See chapter 1

A/N: Thank you all for your wonderful feedback! Here is the promised chapter two. This should put your minds at ease. Well, I hope to have another chapter for you later, but I have to take a certification test, so I wanted to get this up first. Please Read and Review.

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Mac's POV

As I wait with my head in my hands, hoping to hear that she is alright, my mind reviews what happened over half an hour ago. When I thought that I lost her.

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Seconds after she blacked out, the ambulance and the local authorities pulled up. They immediately went to work on her and loaded her into the ambulance. After I had given the authorities a brief run-down of what happened, I quickly jumped into the ambulance. As we approached the hospital, they were preparing her to be moved and I was told to let go of her hand. Once the ambulance stopped, she was quickly rushed into the operating room. One of the nurses who spoke English very well told me to wait in the waiting room and she would come find me when she knew something on Stella's condition. **********

Which brings me to where I am now sitting here, waiting on something that tells me that she is alright! I know that I should call everyone back home and let them know that she is okay, but I don't really want to leave the area. When they come to tell me she is alright, and they will tell me that she is okay, I want to be here to go and see her. I need to see her. As the weight of what happened today, finally sets in I can only cry. I beg God to spare her, because if he takes her, he might as well take me as well. My life is pointless without her in it; she is that grounding force that keeps me going; she is the sunshine when everything else around me is dark and depressing. She has never gave up on me, not when The Towers fell and my life as I knew it stopped and not when Peyton's letter came and I leaned on her again. I know that I have the support of the family that our team has become, but they aren't the same as my Stella, my best friend, my partner, my love. Yes, I love her; I know I do. She understands me, makes me laugh and comforts me in the few times that I have cried. She can complete my thoughts, even the times that I am not exactly sure what I wanted to say. She has to make it! She just has-

"Detective Taylor, we are very sorry about your partner. We are finished up with the scene and thought that I would come and see how she is doing." Detective Christos Temmas said as he sat down beside Mac.

I shook my head, "I haven't heard anything yet."

Christos looked at me, "Don't worry. There are some state of the art doctors on your partner's side she will be fine."

I nod at him, appreciating him checking on me and Stella. As I am about to reply the nurse walks up followed by a man that I suppose is the doctor. I am not my feet before they arrive, "How is she?"

The doctor looks at me wearily and I start to think the worst until he speaks, "She pulled through. She is one tough woman. It was touch and go for a bit, but we were able to remove the bullet. She will have some trouble breathing and will need to take it easy for a couple of weeks, but her lung should heal. Do to the force of the bullet, her lung partially collapsed, but we are excepting a full recovery."

I smiled for the first time in a few hours. "Thank you doctor," I reached my hand out and shook his hand.

"Ms. Bonasera is being transported to room 125 down this hall to the right. You should be able to join her soon." The nurse spoke from beside the doctor.

I nodded my understanding and then proceeded to ask the question on my mind, "When will she be able to leave the country."

"Within a week, maybe a little more depending on how quickly she heals." The doctor looked down as his pager went off and then back at me, "The nurses will have me paged when she wakes up and I will discuss what will happen in the coming days at that time."

I nod and shake his hand, mumbling a "Thank you" to him as the nurse leads me to Stella's room.

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There ya have it! Hope you like this chapter. I might be able to have another chapter up later, just wanted to put your minds at ease. Hope you enjoyed and please review!

Thanks!

:D Doink Doink


	3. Chapter 3

Hang On- Chapter 3

Disclaimer: See Chapter 1

A/N: Okay, sorry that this has taken so long. Not real sure about this one, but I hope you enjoy it anyway! Feedback is always appreciated!

A/N 2: I hope that my Greek is right, not really sure. I ran it through a translator for safety. The English equivalent is at the bottom. Please forgive any mistakes they are all mine! ;)

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Mac's POV

I woke from the nightmare with a start, looking to my left I see Stella's sleeping form and remind myself to breathe. I take her hand in mine making sure that she is alive and that the nightmare was just a nightmare. As I rest my head once again on her bed, my mind wonders back to my nightmare. Where with her dying breath, Stella declared her love for me. And then it hits me, she really did say that she loved me. Right before the ambulance arrived. I smile, touching my lips remembering that I pressed my lips to hers as a response, seconds before she passed out. In the waiting room I was so caught up in hoping she was alive, I forgot her confession.

But as I turn my head slightly so that I can she her face, I have to wonder if she meant what she said or if it was simply something she said, figuring that she wouldn't live to regret it.

I have no doubts about my feelings; this whole incident has only strengthened the love I know I have for her. After debating what to do, my mind finally tires and the only thing that I can do is sleep.

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Stella's POV

I am slowly regaining my bearings, when I sense the light coming through the windows; as well as a weight on my arm and something pulling at my hair. I decide that it is time that I fully open my eyes to see what is partially laying on me. I open my eyes and smile broadly at the sight before me. Mac! My normally tough as nails, don't let any emotions out partner is laying here with his head on one of my arms and his left hand tangled in my hair. I smile, but my smile slightly falters when I realize what lead up to my being here. The murder, Mac's small confession, the photo of my mother, finding Professor P, his brother shooting me, Professor P dying, Mac holding me, and me telling Mac that I love him. I redden as I realize that I confessed something to him, something that I shouldn't have said. But as I lay here watching him sleep, I know that it will be okay. I _do_ love him and I _do_ want him to know that. So I bring my left hand to his face, lightly brushing my fingers across the face that I have come to love. "Mac." I whisper, my lungs not being able to take much more.

He bolts up quickly, his eyes frantically searching around the room before landing on me. "Stella!" He all but yells. I smile at him and I am rewarded with one in return. As he opens his mouth to say something, a nurse walks into the room.

"Miss Bonasera. Good to see you awake." She walks to the phone and pages one of the doctors, before checking my vitals. She sees Mac's hand in mine and smiles lightly, a teasing note to her voice when she says, "I am very glad that you are awake, now maybe your _friend_ here, can calm down alittle." I look to Mac questioning him with my eyes, when he blushes I turn my attention back to the nurse. She clears up my confusion by saying, "Detective Taylor has been very restless while waiting for you to wake up. He has found me multiple times, asking when you were going to wake up."

I squeeze his hand and am about to reply when an older gentleman walks in, "Good to see you awake. How are you feeling?"

Hoarsely I answer, "My lungs are causing me some pain and I am alittle tired, but other wise fine."

He nods and looks over my chart before speaking to the nurse, "Παρακαλώ την προετοιμασία της για ακτίνων Χ-, θα πρέπει να ελέγχουν την ανάπτυξη των πνευμόνων της. ." (1)

Mac looks at me expectantly and so I reply, "Γιατί χρειάζομαι ένα?" (2)

The doctor looks at me in surprise, "You speak Greek?"

I nod, "I was born here." Mac looks at me, questions in his eyes, I put his mind at ease, "I am going to have some x-rays done Mac. They want to make sure that my lungs are okay." Upon his nod, I turn back to the doctor, "What is wrong with my lungs?"

He replies in English, noticing that Mac doesn't speak Greek, "The bullet did not hit any vital organs; however, the impact and force of the bullet caused your left lung to partially collapse. In many cases the lung heals itself and there is no need for medical intervention; however, I would like to take an x-ray to be sure that the lung is healing as expected." At my nod he continues, "Sooner would be better than later."

My voice still raspy, I reply, "Okay." I turn to Mac, "Wait here for me."

He squeezes my hand and then lets go of it, murmuring, "I'll be here."

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Stella's POV

Forty-five minutes later I am back in my room, listening to the doctor walk about my health; about how air travel is out until I my lungs are better, about what I can do to help my lung heal. "The main thing is not to over work your lung. Right now it looks as though it is healing quite nicely and should be healed within the week. For the next three days I would like you to take it easy; no touring or strenuous exercising. You have an appointment to come back here at 10:00am in three days. We wil survey the progress and go from there."

I am about to ask about when I can leave when Mac beats me to it, "Does she have to stay over night again? I have us reservations at a local hotel."

The doctor looks at Mac, "As long as she is not left alone. Collapsed lungs are tricky because the patient usually does not realize how much it will affect them. Walking too much will be a chore and sometimes talking is a chore as well."

Mac nods, "I don't plan on letting her out of my sight."

The doctor nods and shakes Mac hand before turning to me, "Είστε ένας πολύ τυχερή γυναίκα. Ο άντρας σου νοιάζεται για σένα βαθιά." (3)

Before I can correct him on his assumption, he is out the door. The nurse smiling widely on his heels.

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Mac's POV

Thirty long minutes later, we are stepping into a hotel room. The room is modest, but has an amazing view of the city that I thought Stella would appreciate, and they have roomservice so that should minimize Stella having to walk to much.

I placed my things by one of the beds and placed hers beside the other, "Getting hungry?"

"I would love something that wasn't made at the hospital. What did you have in mind?"

I handed her the menu and sheepishly said, "You'll have to read the menu or order for us; it's all in Greek."

She smiled and nodded, turning to grab the phone. While she placed their order, I walked to the window and looked out on the city, wondering what the doctor had said to Stella. Moments later I felt her presence beside me and I turned to her, "Since you aren't allowed to venture out I wanted the room with the best view so you could at least see out."

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Stella's POV

I was touched; the doctor is right, I am a lucky woman. Mac takes such good care of me. Tears shining in my eyes I place a kiss to his cheek, "Thank you Mac."

His eyes cloud with something that I am not familiar with and I am surprised when he is pulling me back to him, gently wiping the tear that feel from my eye. "You're welcome. It's what we do Stel, remember, we take care of each other."

I smile again so touched that he remembered the words that I have offered to him in the past. And before I know it I am crying; not being able to hold back anymore. He walks us back to one of the beds, his arms come around me and he holds me tight whispering that everything is going to be alright.

As I sit there, wrapped in his arms, I know that this is where I belong and that going back to a platonic friendship is out of the question. My cries calm as there is a knock at the door. Moments later Mac it back at my side with food, "Would you like to eat on the balcony?" I nod and we walk to the balcony and eat our meal, not mentioning my breakdown.

I see him look at the food he has before him and smile, "It isn't going to bite. You'll enjoy it. Promise." He smiles and hesitantly takes a bite. He smiles and nods his acceptance of the dish and we eat, him asking me questions about the food and the buildings around us and me answering.

After dinner, I realize how tired the little bit of activity has made me and want nothing more than to go to sleep. As if reading my thoughts Mac replies, "Why don't we turn in early? It's been a hectic few days..."

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Mac's POV

She nods and I clean up what little remains from our meal as she climbs into bed. She looks at me as I turn out the lights and then grab some clothes and head for the bathroom, "I'm going to shower real fast. I'll try to be quite."

She smiles at me, "Okay. Goodnight."

After I come out of the bathroom, I see that she is sleep but that she has kicked off the majority of her covers. I walk around to her bed and fix her covers, standing there watching her for a moment. I have been thanking whatever higher power brought her back to me since they told me she was alright. And I did promise that if I had another chance I would do things differently; so before I turn away, I lean down and kiss her on the forehead. As I pull away I whisper, "I love you Stella. Sleep well."

After I am in bed I roll over to look at her sleeping form and I am surprised at the teary green eyes that greet me.

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Translations to the Greek phrases:

1. Please prepare her for an X-ray, we need to check the development of her lungs.

2. Why do I need one?

3. You are a very lucky woman. Your husband cares for you deeply.

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Well, there ya have it. That was chapter 3! Sorry that I took so long getting it up. This is actually the 4th rewrite, as I couldn't seem to get it right. I still feel that the progression was slow, but I hope you enjoyed it! One possibly two chapters left to go! Thanks for reading!

:D Doink Doink


	4. Chapter 4

Hang On- Chapter 4

A/N: Sorry that this has taken so long to post. Hope you all are still interested and hope you haven't given up on me yet. This is the last chapter of this fic! Hope you enjoy and please review!

Stella's POV

After I tell him goodnight, I roll over in bed and try to sleep while listening to the water running in the bathroom. A time later, I realize that I must have fallen asleep because I wake to feel Mac's lips on my forehead. I am too shocked to move and before I can utter a word I hear him whisper, "I love you Stella. Sleep well." Upon hearing the conviction in his voice, tears come to my eyes. I roll over in bed watching as he climbs into bed, still not knowing what to say to him. Moments later I am met with his beautiful blue eyes and I smile, hopefully clearing the questions that I see there.

Mac's POV  
When I saw her tears I thought the worst; however, looking at the bright smile on her face I know that what I said was not rejected and my mind is at ease. I don't know what to say now; should I say it again? Should I keep quite? What should I do? Stella once again saves me, when she gets up and walks toward me.

Stella's POV  
By the time I reach him, he is sitting on his bed. When I come to a stop in front of him, he stands and wraps me in his arms and I sigh, knowing in this second that we will work everything out. As we pull apart I say the first thing that I can think of, "Say it again!"

His face lights up and I give him a brilliant smile as he says, "I love you Stella!"He smiles at me and I can see him release a breath.

I am still smiling like a fool when I say, "I love you too Mac!"

I am shocked to see my normally somewhat withdrawn partner begin to have tears gather into his eyes and I realize that he was as unsure as I was. And suddenly I wonder how long his has felt this way. But before I can dwell on that thought too much I feel his hand lightly cupping my cheek and I allow him to pull my face to his, fulfilling a long lost dream of mine as our lips touch for the first time.

Our first kiss is better than I ever imagined. And I am almost shocked at the passion and the lover in our kiss. But looking back on the last 10 years and all that we have been through it is no surprise. As we pull apart I am fighting for my breath but still content to stay in his arms. Within seconds he picks up on my discomfort, "I am sorry Stell. I guess we should cool it... Your lungs can't take much of that."

I smile and can't resist the opportunity to tease him, "Oh really? So does that mean that you had more of that planned?"

His face reddens and I am taken by how cute he looks. However he is quick to recover and I am the one left in shock when he replies, "Maybe I just think that we have wasted too much time and I don't want to waste anymore time." He lightly laughs at my perplexed look and I realize that we are ready and that this is okay.

I smile, "Yeah….I have to say that I agree." His arms come around me and I sigh contently, already addicted to being held by him.

Mac's POV

While I stand here with my arms around the most important person in my life, my mind strays to what could happen when we get back to New York. What are we going to do about work? What will our team think? What about Sinclair?

My thoughts are interrupted by Stella asking, "Why are you tensing Mac? What's wrong?"

I smile at how much she knows me, "Nothing Stell." I pull away and then later regret it when I see her reading the questions in my eyes.

She smiles slightly, "Mac you know that I know you better than that. Please tell me."

I sigh and lower my head, knowing that she probably already knows what's wrong and I know that she isn't going to give up, "I was just thinking about what happens when we get back to New York? What is everyone going to think?"

She tilts my face to meet hers and answers, "Mac, I think that everyone will be happy about it. They are our friends Mac; they want to see us happy."

I thought about that and I agree; the team will probably not be that surprised. After all there is a bet going on about when he and Stella would finally be together, even though everyone thinks that I don't know about it. However, I am still skeptical because I know one person that will not be happy with this new development, "Okay Stella, I agree that the team will probably be okay with _us_ but what about Sinclair?"

I am watching Stella's face and I can see her weighing her words before she speaks, "Mac there is no rule about two coworkers being in a relationship. Look at Lindsay and Danny, they are married with Lucy and they still work with us. Their work hasn't suffered; in fact since Danny has Lindsay he takes his work more seriously. "

I nod, "Yes Stel that is all true. But Danny and Lindsay don't run our lab. Sinclair will have a field day with this."

I can see turmoil in her eyes and the last thing I want to do is hurt her more and add to the horrible last few days. But before I can say anything else, she responds. "I know that you lead the lab, but this is not much different than when you were with Peyton. She was an employee here just like me." I think about that and realize that she is correct, I did date Peyton and Peyton was part of the lab. Before I can think too long about it she continues, "Why don't we just keep this between us for now? We can date and spend time with each other outside of work and we just won't tell anyone."

My face whips hers; surprised that she even suggested that, "I can't ask you to do that. It's not fair to you."

She smiles, "I am the one asking you to keep it between us. I would like to just be us without feeling like everyone is watching, at least until we get on our feet."

I look at the woman before so grateful that I have her in my life, "Only if you want to…And this is only temporary. When we feel that we are ready we can tell everyone." She does have a point; this will take some getting used to. Even though we have been friends for more than a decade this is new territory for us both and I know that I can't lose her due to some stupid mistake or someone else's comment. So this is the best solution for now.

"Okay. We can talk about when we want to tell everyone later, but for now we can enjoy being us." I smile and wrap her in my arms again as I thank whatever higher power brought her to me. I can feel her giggling and when I ask her what she simply says, "Wonder who will figure us out first?"

I smile along with her, "I don't know…but it will be interesting to see how long we can keep this from people who get paid to pay attention to detail."

There are still over questions in my mind, but I feel that in the present situation that we have covered enough and that we both that this is right. As she pulls away her face turns serious again and I realize that she has once again read the questions in my head. However as she pulls me to bed a whole other set of questions arise, but she is quick to answer, "I am exhausted Mac and I would like to sleep. Would you lay with me?"

I smile and follow, knowing that I cannot deny her anything, "Of course."

After we are curled up together with her head on my chest her says, "I know you have other questions and you aren't sure about things but we don't have to have all the answers. We just take it one day at a time."

I smile and kiss her forehead, "One day at a time."

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THE END!

Thank you for those who have read, reviewed, and/or alerted. I am so pleased with the positive feedback that I have gotten for this fic! Sorry that this chapter took so long to post, but I have been busy with midterms and farm life…

I am thinking of doing a sequel that continues when they get back to New York, but I am not sure... Let me know what you think and if you have any ideas for case files because I would like to have cases in my fic as well. Thank for reading and I hope you enjoyed!

:D Doink Doink


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